My beautiful brand new Kenwood food mixer broke this afternoon.
Shadow has a bad tummy.
Rosie won't lay still on the mat anymore, rolls all over the floor and is constantly complaining when she gets stuck against things.
Lilly will not stop saying mummy.
The house is a TIP.
I've ran out of bibs.
Oh, and I went out for a birthday meal and drinks last night. I'm shattered and Mark's working late.
Rosie's on the side in the kitchen in her bumbo, I'm trying to feed her while Lilly's dinner is cooking....
Shadow wants to go in the garden so I let him out.
Lilly "mummy"
Me "yes"
......
"Yes???"
Carry on feeding Rosie.
Check the potatoes. They're done.
"Mummy. Where's my hairbrush? I can't find it."
"It's right there!!!"
Look out of the window. Shadow just vomited.
Drain the potatoes.
Feed Rosie another spoonful.
"Mummy?"
"Yes?"
"I haven't been fed"
"I know. I'm cooking your dinner now"
"Mummy?"
"Yes?"
"I want my dinner"
Let Shadow in, wipe his paws. Rosie's shouting cause she wants more food.
Spoon more food into her, grab the colander which had the veg steaming in it and burn my hand.
Stick my fingers into a pot of honey to stop them blistering.
"Mummy?"
Rosie's shouting. I spoon slop into her face with my left hand (my right is still in a pot of honey.)
Shadow wants to go out.
"Mummy?"
"YES!!!!!"
Rosie grabs a dirty oven glove and puts it in her mouth.
"Shadow wants to go out"
.....
I wash my honeyed fingers. (Seems to have worked!! Meant to have tried that trick for years.)
Rosie vomits.
I let Shadow out.
"Mummy...."
I mash the potatoes and put the chicken nuggets under the grill.
I spoon more food into Rosie.
Shadow wants to come in. Let him in, wipe his paws.
"Mummy I broke my sheriff Cally hat"
"I'll fix it later, Lilly."
Pop the veg onto Lilly's plate, make a mash volcano...NUGGETS!!
Only a bit burnt.
"Mummy....I want an apple for my dinner"
Make gravy.
"Mummy...bogey" offered up on her finger.
Ok. Lilly's dinner's ready.
Rosie's screaming and covered in baby rice and sick.
Make her a bottle and put it in cold water to cool.
Shadow's asking to go out again.
"Mummy!!!! Need a poo poo!!"
I need a wee. And a holiday.
And a cleaner.
